Getting back on Facebook this year after being off of it for five years has been an interesting experience for me. Some things have changed and some have stayed the same... One thing that is the same is the cornucopia of comments on any given holiday. Today there are many, many loving and positive comments posted by people about their fathers.
I posted about the dessert I made about my husband. I rejoiced that I successfully made the custard for creme brulee and that my husband used the kitchen torch I bought a few months ago to carmelize sugar on top to make the key crusty topping that it needs!
I didn't say anything about my husband, though I am very grateful (as are my kids) for who he is and the piece of the puzzle he is in our family. He is one of kind--always saying something off the wall to make us laugh or think. He balances me as a parent and as my husband. He tells me that I balance him, too.
Many of the comments were made by people about their spouses, but just as many are made about their fathers.
But, I didn't. I thought about my dad this morning during church and remembered the time when my kids asked me to tell them some good things about my dad. What did he give me? He gave me the belief that I could do anything I set my mind to. I inherited my strong will and stubborn determination from him. But, I also inherited the personality trait of being an entrepreneur. I am always thinking of new ways to tackle problems or new things. I am a salesperson at heart like my dad.
Not all relationships are the ones that we paint on Facebook. That is the tough part about Facebook. I read several comments today that were very complementary of parents who have provoked their children in the past as Ephesians 6 exhorts fathers not to do. Facebook is not all real. There's always another side. Sometimes it's a good side, but sometimes it's a bad side. Facebook simply doesn't tell the whole story, which is what makes it such an effective trap! A comparison trap.
It is easy to get mired down in the dysfunction of certain relationships, yet I believe there is good that can come from also remembering the good as my children's query did for me. I wanted to share this in case someone else might feel the way I do when I see all of the posts on Facebook. In general, I stay away from Facebook on holidays and near holidays because I have learned it isn't good for my heart and my thoughts. I have learned that this is wise for me to do. Seeing or hearing things that cause us to fall into competitive thought patterns or make us feel bad about our own lives or struggle with the lives God has given us isn't helpful. I come back to this scripture...
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philippians 4:8, ESV