Sunday, December 7, 2008

saving money =) and being wise

Well, I thought I would post little ways that I find to save money. So, here's the first one. I registered for my baby showers at Target because I wanted to stay on their mailing lists for coupons. Periodically, I get booklets or individual coupons from them. So, this week, I got two coupons. 1) $10 off $100 or more and 2) $5 off $75 or more. I read the backs and there weren't any exclusions. So, I purchased a $100 gift card for $90. Yay! I shop there all the time for groceries, toiletries, prescriptions, clothing/shoes for the kids, etc. So, it won't take me long before it's used. And I'm just going to write it into the budget as I buy the things I need. I know that the key is not to feel like I have free money and use it for things I want instead of need. But, I don't plan on doing that. Anyways, that was my little fun way to save some money this week =)

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Dryer Lint

I found this on the web. I bought one of those lint brushes last month (the really long ones for cleaning out your dryer vent) at Bed Bath and Beyond. I saw one this week at Target last week, though. So, they carry them too. Anyways, I went outside to clean the hood where my dryer vents to the outside and the flap was almost sealed shut because there was so much lint that had built up on top of the flap (in addition to a tiny dead wasps nest). So, I cleaned it up with my brush and now it opens and closes =) I'm so thankful that I thought to clean it and get the brush, because if it had sealed shut then the lint would have continued to build up and eventually wouldn't have been able to get out of the house and could have caught on fire =( !!! Ay ay ay! Below is a quick summary that I found on the web that I just thought I'd pass on to you =)


Dryer Fires

The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission estimates that in 1998, clothes dryers were associated with 15,600 fires, which resulted in 20 deaths and 370 injuries. Fires can occur when lint builds up in the dryer or in the exhaust duct. Lint can block the flow of air, cause excessive heat build-up, and result in a fire in some dryers.

Clean the lint screen/filter before or after drying each load of clothes. If clothing is still damp at the end of a typical drying cycle or drying requires longer times than normal you may have a restricted vent.

Clean the dryer vent and exhaust duct at least once a year. Check the outside dryer vent while the dryer is operating to make sure exhaust air is escaping. If it is not, the vent or the exhaust duct may be blocked. To remove a blockage in the exhaust path, it may be necessary to disconnect the exhaust duct from the dryer. Remember to reconnect the ducting to the dryer and outside vent before using the dryer again.

Clean behind the dryer, where lint can build up. Have a qualified service person clean the interior of the dryer chassis periodically to minimize the amount of lint
accumulation. Keep the area around the dryer clean and free of clutter. Replace plastic or foil, accordion-type ducting material with rigid or corrugated
semi-rigid metal duct. Most manufacturers specify the use of a rigid or corrugated
semi-rigid metal duct, which provides maximum airflow. The flexible plastic or foil type duct can more easily trap lint and is more susceptible to kinks or crushing, which can greatly reduce the airflow.

Take special care when drying clothes that have been soiled with volatile chemicals such as gasoline, cooking oils, cleaning agents, or finishing oils and stains. If possible, wash the clothing more than once to minimize the amount of volatile chemicals on the clothes and, preferably, hang the clothes to dry. If using a dryer, use the lowest heat setting and a drying cycle that has a cool-down period at the end of the cycle. To prevent clothes from igniting after drying, do not leave the dried clothes in the dryer or piled in a laundry basket.

Source: CPSC Publication 502

Monday, November 10, 2008

A New Friend

Making a new friend is like getting a surprise present that you didn't expect. And today I got to make a new one! I'm such an extrovert that making a new friend really is a blessing to me. But, I do have a funny story about this new friend.

I don't know if this has happened to you, but a few years before I married my husband I dated someone that I fell in love with--but he didn't happen to fall in love with me. God taught me a lot through that relationship--most importantly that I could fall in love, which I wasn't sure I could do. God also used that relationship to really help me love and appreciate my husband because of how he's different than this other guy. Once in a while, I've wondered what happened to that guy and how things turned out for him.

Well, tonight I was telling this gal from my church about Paul and she asked what his last name was. It turns out that she knew him! It is the most wild thing to me. He is married, which I knew, and has 2 boys. I'm glad he has boys. Anyways, it was the craziest thing to me! Here I am, many states away, and I meet someone that knew him. Pretty crazy!

The gutters

So, I started today by calling someone to help me with my gutters. I feel good knowing that it will be taken care of and that I can tackle the things I need to with our house. I talked with my mom about what I felt yesterday and she shared with me that that's the way it is with most friendships. You learn over time what is best to ask of your friend and what is wise not to ask. It is a dance just like most relationships are. You have to figure out where to step so that the dance goes together and that you don't step on each other's toes. And that dance looks different with every friend. I realized that my mom is right and I am thankful that she shared that with me. So, that's what I've been thinking about today. Ultimately, God always takes care of us.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Being a friend

Today I was hit with a hard realization. My husband is away for a while The first two weeks really went quite easily even with a birthday party for the girls at the end of the first week. Then this week I worked on painting our bathroom upstairs. I'm going to do the second coat on the walls tomorrow and then that will be done. But, this weekend was hard.

Friday morning I awoke at 6:30 am feeling absolutely horrible. I went between the bathroom and the floor for half an hour. I couldn't get any farther. I lay on the floor wondering what I was going to do. I have a 6 month old, a 3 year old, and a 5 year old. None of whom know how to call 911 if I needed them to. Everyone I could think of needed to go to work or had commitments. They need to take care of their own lives and their own families. Thankfully, after a half an hour I was able to make it into the shower and recover. It was as if I had a 30 minute flu instead of the 24 hour flu.

What would I have done if it had lasted? I don't know. I've had many friends offer to help me during this time, but I realized on Autumn's birthday that my girls have really only got me and I've got them. No one could come celebrate her birthday with me. They had their own lives to live and I understand. Their friends were able to come to the girls birthday party later that week and I was so thankful for how all of that turned out.

Anyways, today I decided to try and clean out the gutters on my house. I was able to fanagle the ladder down. It was so heavy! I bonked my back in the process. I tried to be very careful. I was able to do the garage but not the rest of the house. It was just too high and I've never walked on a roof. I've asked two men to come help, but today I realized I'm asking a lot. So, I'm going to call and pay someone to do it.

As much as people have good intentions and really do care about us, it takes a lot to drop everything for someone else. I wonder if people think of me that way or think that I'm too busy to help them. I hope not. This trip has made me look at a lot of things differently and the weight of life seems a lot heavier to me than it did three weeks ago.

I have a friend who I used to be really close to, but she doesn't have time for me anymore. She has other obligations and other friends who are her priorities now. Sometimes it hurts--when I think about it. It wasn't my choice. But, we don't get to choose everything in our lives. I have to be thankful for when I do get to talk to her, but the rest of the time let it go. When I talk to her, I remember how much I like talking to her and it makes me miss her. It still hurts and it's been this way for a long time.

Everyone has their priorities in their lives and they have relationships in their lives which are more important than others. It is a given. I can't choose how important my friendship is to someone else, but I can be thankful when their friendship is as important to me as it is to them. That truly is an amazing gift.

Now I understand why the Bible encourages the church to care for widows and children. I am going to be much more mindful of that as I walk forward. I have a friend here who is the single mom of 3 boys. I am going to pray about how I can help her. She has a very full plate. Well, I hear my kids waking from their naps and the tears beginning so I better go take care of them.

Life will go on and I will press on. =)

And the first thing I know I need to do is teach Autumn how to use the phone and call 911...

Friday, November 7, 2008

The test of a parenting model...

This is an excerpt from Grace-based Parenting by Tim Kimmel, pp.9-10.
"The real test of a parenting model is how well equipped the children are to move into adulthood as vital members of the human race. Notice I didn't say "as vital members of the Christian community." We need to have kids that can be sent off to the most hostile universities, toil in the greediest work environments, and raise their families in the most hedonistic communities and yet not be the least bit intimidated by their surroundings. Furthermore, they need to be engaged in the lives of people in their culture, gracefully representing Christ's love inside these desperate surroundings. The apostle Paul gave us as parents an excellent goal for our children to pursue:
"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life--in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing. Philippians 2:14-16"

I was reading Michelle's comment to my last post (thanks Michelle =) ) and it brought this quote to my mind about what my yardstick should be about what I expose my children to. My goal is not to hide them away but it is also not to throw them to the wolves. I want them to be strong enough to fight and stand up, but I don't want to push it on them before they're old enough to grow. I just don't know yet, what that looks like, but I pray and hope that God will lead me.

The verse from Philippians is very challenging to me. I know that I need to live a better life and I need to be a better model to my children than I am.

High School Musical 2

Last Saturday, Focus on the Family was on the radio with thier weekend roundup show. It's sort of a summary from the week with little snippets. One of the snippets was actually on High School Musical and what a great positive influence it is. I was very skeptical.

So many young girls (ages 5-10) are big into Hannah Montana, iCarly, and High School Musical. It's so hugely commercialized. I feel like I see it everywhere--and then to hear about it from Focus on the Family. Wow!

I actually didn't get to hear what they had to say, but it made me curious and determined to make up my mind for myself what I think about the High School Musical craze. From my Netflix this week, I got High School Musical 2.

It was indeed pretty wholesome. I can't remember any language and aside from Sharpei's very revealing outfits, there wasn't any other barely clad bodies. The message was that friends are more important than everything else--I think. It made me realize how out of touch I am with fashion. It surprises me what is considered wholesome dress nowadays. All in all, I can't say that I have any huge objections--minus one very big one.

Is it age appropriate for the little girls viewing it? It definitely is appropriate for middle schoolers and high schoolers (though I think it might be too Junior Highish for them). But, do 3rd and 4th graders really need to be focused on dating and having a boyfriend and the cutest boy in school? Do they need any more encouragement in that direction than is naturally already in school.

A friend of mine used to teach 5th grade in Colorado. It was part of her curriculum to teach Sex Education. She had to push to get the okay to teach abstinence. It's so hard to believe, but true. This is what truly happened to a friend of mine. After teaching her class one day, one of the little girls said that she wished her cousin had heard that lesson before she got pregnant (as a 7th grader). And another little boy came to tell her that two children in the other 5th grade class had had sex.

I know that sex is a far cry from dating. They're truly very far apart. But, my point is, are our kids being exposed to things too young--whether it's dating or sex? Are we letting them be kids and are we even helping them stay kids? Or are we allowing the culture to send them on a wave that's going to crash very quickly onto the shore.

I'm thankful my friend had the courage to speak to her students about what they were already being exposed to. But, is it possible to stave off that exposure until they're a little older? I don't know the answer to this one.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Principles for Disciplining

I've been trying to get some reading done, so I'm making my way through Help for the Harried Homeschooler. One of the early chapters is about discipline and one of the last things she wrote in the chapter seems very wise to me. Here is the excerpt...

One of the Practical Pointers from Help for the Harried Homeschooler by Christine Field
Write out a list of principles to guide you in yoru discipline. Post it inside a kitchen or bathroom cabinet. Refer to it often. It might read something like this:
1. Effective discipline always comes from the heart.
2. It honors God; it is not for my convenience.
3. It is gentle rather than harsh.
4. It preserves my child's dignity.
5. It recognizes good behavior.
6. It inspires self-control and confidence.
7. It trains my child above all things to follow Christ.

I don't know if I'm going to post it inside my cupboard =) but I think I definitely want to write this list down and keep it in my Bible so I can pray that God will give me wisdom in how I discipline my kids.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My little girl is 5!

I don't think it's really hit me yet that Autumn is 5 today. She still seems so little to me, but I know she's getting older! It's so hard to believe.

I took the kids out to lunch because the weather is a little bad and I didn't want to try and brave the evening cold. They were really good. All of them. I have to remember that when I get upset. They have their struggles, but they're doing well =) It is such a blessing. Well, I need to run and get working on their birthday party for Saturday. I hope it will go well!

Help For the Harried Homeschooler

Isn't that a perfect title? =) I picked up this book by Christine Field. It has a lot of things I know already, but also a lot of good reminders and tips. One succinct phrase about discipline is "The more you yell, the more you yell."

It's easy to fall into the trap of yelling. I want to put a stop to it. I know it can be done. I was encouraged to talk to a friend last night who is a veteran homeschooler and is still homeschooling two of her children. She shared with me that when her oldest two were young, she yelled for a time. But, she got through it and she isn't that way anymore. Sometimes I wonder if I can change and get out of this rut. It was encouraging to hear that I can and will. =)

The rest of the book is about balancing life with homeschooling on so many levels and making choices. It's a keeper!

Friday, October 24, 2008

A great little book!

Yesterday, I went to a homeschool book store and I found a great little book. It is titled Prayer: Learning to Talk to God. It is by Jeanette L. Groth and illustrated by Jan Brett. It is a great book! It is perfect for explaining and discussing prayer with 4 and 5 year olds. The wording of the book is simple and Biblical. The author talks about each of the different things we talk to God about: Praise, Needs/Wants, Other People, Guidance, etc. For each explanation, there is an excellent illustration of a situation showing a child who would want/need to talk to God about that thing. Let me explain... On the page addressing Praise, there is a young girl standing at the beach looking up at the sky with a smile on her face. On the page explaining that we pray for Guidance, there is a young girl taking care of her garden (her chores, I assume) who is being asked by friends to go fishing. The illustrations are great for starting discussions with our children. I love this little book and I just wanted to let you know about it. I had never heard of it--I just happened to find it on the shelf amidst a bunch of other books =)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Taking Care of Myself

One of the hardest things for me about having 3 little kids is finding time to take care of the things that I need. I know it's important to take care of me, but somehow taking care of things for myself always gets put off. Sometimes it's hard for me to know what to do. But, God reminded me several times this weekend that he will take care of me and help me find ways to do the things I need to do =)

At times, I've tried to go to stores to shop for certain things and it just doesn't go well =( So, anyways, there's a few things that I've needed and God has provided for me and I am so humbled. Last week, I bought some clothes at a garage sale for $6 so they're new to me and most of them fit. I saved a sleep set for my mom and gave a pair of jeans to some neighbor girls, but the rest fit =) 2 pairs of jeans, a skirt, and 2 pairs of pants. The clothes were a blessing to me. With every child I've had, my jeans seem to fit a little different even though I get back to the same size, so I've needed to get rid of some clothes and find a few new ones each time.

This summer when we went to Dutch Wonderland, I had to take my old swimsuit from 10 years ago. I haven't bought a new one since I've been married and since I've had 3 kids! It looked horrible and I felt so horrible in it. I've been trying to find a swimuit I've liked for a few years.

This story jumps around a little, sorry...So, last night, Chris and I went on a date with Eli. I wore some jeans I found at a garage sale a month ago, shoes I found while with my mom in June, a shirt I already had, and a jacket I bought at a garage sale 2 months ago. It felt good to feel nice in what I was wearing. We went to the Bonefish Grill and it was wonderful--I had a coupon that made it more affordable. Eli was great and it was refreshing to get to enjoy such a nice meal with my husband! Afterwards, we went into Sears. There were some Land's End swimsuit pieces on a rack. There was only 1 bottom in my size and 2 top pieces. I've really wanted a tankini. I tried them on and they fit! A little snug in my chest area, but it'll fit better next summer. They were $12 for each piece so we bought all three. It made me smile because I have felt yucky about the swimsuit thing and I actually even got rid of it so I didn't have one at all. And it is just so hard to try things on with the girls! But, yay, I have a swimsuit now that was 75% off!

The other thing God blessed me with yesterday was with my flu shot. I needed to get it from the County Health Department, because they are the only ones in the area that will give it to adults without the Thimerosol. The rest of my family had already gotten theirs, but I wasn't sure when I would be able to. But, the kids and I went to a festival with my friend. The Health Dept was there and there was no line! I got it done lickety split!

So, at the end of the day, I am amazed and humbled by how God has been so kind to me in my struggles of wanting to feel selfish and feeling yucky by not having clothes and things that I needed. But, he provided even more than I imagined--he blessed me with a wonderful date with my husband, a wonderful meal which we enjoyed together, a new swimsuit that fits, and clothes that fit, too! And I didn't have to drag the kids to a store =) to do it =)

As a little added note that's in the same vein, I did go garage saling yesterday--the end of the season. I only found a few things, but at one I found two fancy dresses. A 4 and a 5. The 5 is actually more like a size 3. Autumn and Sami were going to have to wear dresses they already had for their birthday costume party in 2 weeks. I felt a little bad for that, but didn't want to spend $40-60 on costumes this year. I picked up these dresses and didn't think they were that pretty, but offered the lady $1 for each and she said that would be fine. I brought them home and put them on the girls. They were beautiful!! Such fancy, princess dresses! Autumn's is purple and Sami's has a light blue skirt and black top. It made me smile to realize that God knew how much they would like those dresses--not only does he love me so well, He loves my girls so very much!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Leatherheads--full of fun laughs =)

So, there are definitely good movies in the world and bad movies in the world. It's so frustrating to sit through 2 hours of a movie that you keep hoping is going to get better. I think to myself, "It has an amazing cast. It has to get better!" But, then it doesn't. That was the case on Saturday night for us. We watched the Towering Inferno with Paul Newman, Faye Dunaway, and Steve McQueen among many others in it. It wasn't just cheesy. It was a bad script and just plain bad as a movie.

On Sunday night, I cajoled Chris into watching Leatherheads with me. Granted it is a football movie and he isn't the biggest fan. I'm the football fan in our family =) But, from the opening scene with a cow, you could tell this movie would just be full of fun laughs. It reminds me of Oh, Brother Where Art Thou? and John Cleese movies. Both movies star George Clooney and in both he just makes me laugh. Honestly, I like Leatherheads better than O, Brother Where Art Thou? Even if you don't like football, I think you'd like this movie. It's not really about football. There's less than 10 words of bad language probably and there's no sex in the movie. So, if you're looking for something to watch for fun--look up Leatherheads. And let me know if you like it! Hopefully, I'm making a good recommendation. =)

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Men and their Stereos

So, a fun little thing... My husband is very musical and really, truly enjoys music. Five years ago we bought our stereo, a component system. It's worked well, except that our remote broke and we never were able to fix it. We've now lived in this house for almost 3 years and periodically Chris talks about wanting a speaker system and receiver for our television. The funny part is that he hates the television, but he does enjoy watching movies sometimes. But, he struggles with the sound from our television, hence the desire for speakers. We've never bought anything for the tv because a speaker/receiver system would cost between $300 and $500.

The past two weeks we've been talking a lot about how much is enough and making the most of what we have rather than feeling like we have to buy something new if we have something we can alter to make it work. So, this week I cut and hemmed a set of sheets a friend had given me to make a sheet for Sami's toddler bed instead of paying $30 for a set of toddler sheets. I bought a $3 table for our fish tank and put new knobs on it ($8) instead of buying a fish tank stand ($150!). And we love it =) So, this idea has been coming up a lot for us. Today, I went garage saling and I bought a Sony receiver for $5 and a pair of JBL bookshelf speakers for $3. I didn't realize how old the receiver was at the time (10-15 years old). I knew I was taking a chance and I wasn't sure what Chris would think, but I brought them home.

A month ago, I know Chris would have been very skeptical about the receiver and speakers but his mind really has changed after our recent conversations (and I understand this because I know he values good tone quality so much). The huge blessing is that the receiver and speakers do work well! He is enjoying them! Yahoo! What a blessing they are. The speakers really do make a difference and now my husband can really enjoy the sound when we watch Indiana Jones when it comes out soon on DVD! And now I can too, because I haven't gotten to go to the movie theater with my husband in 4 years. I know it's just one of those things that happens when kids come along =) It sounds like such a silly little thing, but I really think that God knows how much Chris enjoys the music and sound from movies and provided this receiver and speakers so that we can enjoy them together =)

Thanks God!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

losing things

I have to admit I hate losing things! I have so many things to keep track of and I try so hard! But, still it happens. I can't find my science book for this week for the girls and I'm a bit frustrated. I saw it yesterday, but now I can't seem to find it. I'm going to pray that God will help me find it soon =) I realize that this is only the beginning. With three kids underfoot, I'm sure we will all be losing things often and I'd be much better off not taking it all so seriously and stressing about it.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Just a thought about Garage Saling

A good friend of mine emailed this to me in my struggles with my shortcomings and I wanted to share it because it was so well put and very encouraging to me...

"We need to look at our shortcomings, but remember that we can't stop there. We need to remember not just that our sin drove Christ to the cross, but that HIS LOVE for us drove Him there as well, and, most importantly, His love for His own glory. He died that HE may be glorified, right? So that HE could stay completely just and completely merciful, and we would have a way to come into His presence in order to lift HIM on high. SO - it GLORIFIES the Father to be merciful to you, not simply because He loves you, but because displays of His mercy help us understand a new dimension of His greatness. It GLORIFIES the Father to provide you with strength, and patience, and high-end childrens clothing for 25 cents. Because every good thing you do or is done to you during the day is God's, in that they are manifestations of some dimension of His character in our daily lives on earth. Every bad thing you do or is done to you during the day, that's Christ's, on the cross, because He loved you enough to take it. That's the ULTIMATE manifestation of God's glory on earth."

Dear friend thank you for your words. You are right. God has given you a great deal of wisdom =)

It made me smile especially about your comment about high-end children's clothing for 25 cents. It is one of the little ways that God always makes me smile as I see him provide for my children in ways that are more than I could imagine. And it is something that matters so much to me since the kids I went to school with made comments about my clothes. And yet my children wear Baby Gap dresses, even Laura Ashley, and Gymboree dresses that I've found for 25 cents. He has mercy and grace for me, my children, and my husband.

Thank you, God, for your gracious mercy and love!

The Biggest Loser

Okay, so I like that show. It encourages me to keep working out and it's fun to see people achieve their goals.

So, on Saturday, I found the Biggest Loser workout DVD at a garage sale for $.50. I thought I'd buy it and pass it on, because usually I can't do a lot of workouts that other people can because of my knees. I stick to the older Leslie Sansone videos. I can't even do her new ones because they involve too much twisting on my knees. Anyways, I did the first low impact cardio workout today--and I liked it! It was fun to do something different and I think it was really good for me to do a longer stretch and cool down stretch than I usually do. Tomorrow I'll find out how my knees did with it =) I'm looking forward to trying the other workouts on the DVD!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The Leap Pad

Generally in our house, we stay away from electronic toys, but I was curious--like the cat. =) And like the cat, I've suffered the same fate =)

Leap Pads. Before I begin, are there any tricks that make them easier to use? Please let me know.

I've seen the leap pad toy around for a long time. We have the fridge magnets, which we love, and the letter factory/word factory videos (which are wonderful!), but the leap pad seems like a really poorly designed toy. The pages have to sit exactly so, so that the pad will pick up the right page to give the right words. That's a little tricky for a 2-4 year old and even for many 5 year olds! I am thankful. I have to be honest. I actually bought it at a garage sale, because I was curious about it. I paid $3 and it came with 4 books. The one I bought is in very good shape--I don't buy toys that aren't. I know that this toy is going to seriously frustrate my girls.

As a side note, I tried to go online and give feedback to LeapFrog and their website won't allow it. You can only join a discussion forum. Hmmm.. So they don't want direct feedback?

Monday, September 15, 2008

exercise again

back on track...I have to get back on track with exercising. Not because of the weight from pregnancy, but because it's the best thing for me. Post Partum Depression is a very real thing. My hormones really do unsettle me during the first year after my children have each been born. But, I know exercise can and hopefully really will help me =) so I'm making it a priority again! My goal is to get up with Chris, get him out the door, and then exercise. But, now I need to get to my chores!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

a new chimney

I am tired, but God is so gracious. This week we found out on Monday that we needed a new chimney. It was put in today. Normally, I get stressed about all phone calls and follow up and the cost involved with home repairs that we can't do ourselves. But, this time, I have been pretty calm. I realized that the holes that rusted through had probably been there a while and although we needed to get it fixed asap, it wasn't going to be the end of the world if it took a week or two. It did make things a little harried at times trying to juggle phone calls and workmen visits with homeschooling and the rest of life, but it's done now!

But, there's another reason it seems minor this week. I have several friends who have major health issues going on in their lives and other big things to tackle--things that are much bigger than my little chimney. One of them is a friend of my Chris', Keith. Please pray for him. He took a 40 ft fall in California while hiking 10 days ago. He is in serious condition in a hospital in California. I get the chills when I think of his fall and how he is now. And then I pray.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

not being needed

Last night, we had a first. Our first date without Eli. He's 4 1/2 months old and my friend who babysits for us took care of him. We went to dinner by ourselves and then came back and fed him. Then we went out for coffee and came back. We were gone about 2 1/2 hours total. It was strange and good for us to be by ourselves. I didn't have to worry about him waking up or being fussy. Chris said he felt younger and that was good for him--not to feel so old.

The odd part was when we came home Eli didn't "need" me the way Sami used to. Sami was so clingy. We didn't go on a date for the first 12 months of her life because she was so attached and we didn't have anyone she would stay with (in addition to nursing every 2 1/2 hours until she was 12 months old--that made things a little more complicated). So, it feels very different this time. Part of me wants to be needed again that way and another part of me is very, very thankful that I can let him go.

lessons for the mommy

This week has been a good one. Challenging, but good. I've learned far more than I expected. But, I've had far more learning to do than Autumn has, I think. I have learned a lot about homeschooling and how I need to change things for next week and adjust to who she is and where she is at developmentally.

At the end of the week, these are my conclusions...
* I'm going to shorten our reading and math lessons.
* Everything needs to be in the morning and not the afternoon.
* Their alarm is going to be set for 7:30 am instead of 7:00 am and if Sami wakes first, I'm going to tell her not to wake up Autumn.
* They are going to go back to having quiet nap/reading time in their rooms after lunch. I need a break =) and I'm running out of steam.

I'm sure there are more, but that's all I can remember right now!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

listening or rather not listening to directions...

This week has been very eye opening. I am observing and noticing what I need to learn in order to be a better homeschooling mom and teacher and what my daughter needs to learn to be a good homeschooling student.

My weakness when I was a teacher in a first grade classroom was not understanding how small concepts had to be broken down--and I lost my patience very quickly. This week, in particular today, I am seeing how detailed my directions need to be. I am going to be working very consciously and deliberately on this.

On the other hand, I realized that my daughter does not listen! Wowsers! In a classroom, Autumn listens very well. She is a compliant child and very influenced by peer pressure and conformity. So, she listens along with everyone else and follows directions. But, at home, it's just Autumn and maybe Sami and Mommy. Very, very different!

I had forgotten that most of kindergarten in the public schools is not focused on teaching students academic and learning concepts, but rather teaching them how to be students! This is what Autumn needs to learn, too, and so do I! So, our learning shall begin (actually it already has!) !

Please forgive my grammar/punctuation errors in this posting--I am tired today! =)

Monday, September 1, 2008

enjoying the moment...

Life is not easy, nor did I really expect it to be. Today I find myself challenged to enjoy each moment that I can and continue walking and trusting in the others that are difficult.

I had a conversation with a dear friend of mine on Saturday about how much children model the example of their parents. She told me that I don't realize how much Autumn is a little "Suzanne". She does imitate many things I say and do. Autumn had a hard time coping with something last week and it made me think of myself and struggling with post partum depression. She wouldn't understand that, nor should she. So, I need to model for her how to cope in healthy ways with disappointment and struggles.

I am faced with the question, "What do I want my children to learn from me?" on an emotional level rather than an intellectual level. I am praying that the Lord will guide me and that my children will grow strong in their faith and that they will be able to acknowledge and cope with their disappointments, sadness, anger, and struggles.

Friday, August 29, 2008

God's protection for little children...

Oh, my goodness, my little Sami! Everyone says to me, well now you have a boy! As if a boy is going to be the one in our family getting into all the mischief. Every time someone says that to me, I reply, "Ah, but you don't know Sami."

My little Sami. She is exuberant and willful. She has a mind that gets set on things and she goes after them. So determined! And yet, also so disobedient. It is interesting because her disobedience is not rooted in any meanness or intent to disobey me, per say. It is rooted simply in her desire to do whatever it is that she has her mind and heart set on!

Yesterday, we were at the farmer's market. She didn't stay with Autumn, Eli, and me, but went around the other side of the car, stepped on some broken glass and needed to be bandaged up. Ay Ay Ay! Thank goodness for the kindness of friends who helped me juggle everything.

This week, she has
1. Poured soap from Chris' head and Shoulder's bottle into the bath tub--to make bubbles for the fish to eat. I'm not sure if she drank any of the water with bubbles or not.
2. Opened our toothpaste (again not sure if she ate any), attempted to open the listerine, and emptied out the dental floss while "going to the potty".
3. I can't even remember number three right now. I'm tired =) But, somehow, I remember there to be several more things. Oh, yes, she climbed where she was told not to in Duke's Lagoon at Dutch Wonderland and fell.

There is a reason why she is my child who broke her foot at 18 months old simply running down the hall!

I am thankful for God's protection of my child. And I pray that I will be able to help her learn that when Mommy says "NO!" there is a very good reason why!

So, for now, I am trying to help her learn that she must obey and follow directions in even the little things. I have to find the strength in the Lord to stand firm with her moment by moment and help her to learn that it is important to do what she is told to do. It takes a lot of energy!

And when do I get to sleep??? Maybe next year.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Potty Training...Yahoo!

Last night, my little Sami woke me at 2 am crying because she needed to use the potty! She hadn't wet her pants, but she knew she needed to go and it was dark and everyone was sleeping. I woke, then she went and used the potty, and then went back to bed.

I think she's really getting it! This morning she's gone twice when she's needed to go. I heard her say once, "I need to go potty." She walked right out of the room quickly to the bathroom and went!

I am so thankful that this is going as well as it is! I am also glad that I waited until she was closer to 3. I'm sure she could have done it earlier, but I don't know if I would have had enough patience.

I'm very proud of her.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Weighty Thoughts

Lately, I've been thinking a lot of things about my weight. Much of it is prompted because I had a baby almost 4 months ago. But, to be honest, I think I probably would think about it anyways.

When I was growing up, my dad was always encouraging me to watch my weight. And then when I graduated from college at 122 lbs., my dad suddenly turned to me and said, "so when are you going to gain some weight?" (implying I was too thin) and in my mind I replied, "when have I ever been thin enough?" Most of my family struggles with their weight or watch their weight and several people including my dad have Type 2 Diabetes. So, it's something I think about for that reason.

With each of my pregnancies I've gained more weight. First, 39 lbs. with Autumn, then 43 lbs. with Sami and now 47 lbs. with Eli. When I hit 25 lbs. with Autumn the first time, my doctor expressed some concern and cautioned me to watch what I was eating. But, after I lost all but 5 lbs. within 2 or 3 months after having her, he told me not to worry. And so, when I had Sami and had already gained 22 lbs. and was only 23 weeks into my pregnancy, he said he wasn't worried about how much weight I had gained. This time I had some wonderful midwifes who didn't put any pressure on me at all. They told me that everyone gains a different amount of weight during their pregnancies and that it's okay. But, let me be honest, I love sweets, and I know that some of my weight gain is definitely do to that--I am guilty! I do work out after having each of my children and I breastfeed, which I think helps a lot. So, now I'm just about 4 months out and I have about 5 lbs. to lose to get to my prepregnancy weight this time around (122 lbs., I think). I can fit in my 10s, but not in my 8s yet.

One of my good friends long ago told me that I needed to be prepared that I would likely never get back into my 6s after having Autumn, because women's bodies change with pregnancy--no matter how hard we may want to get them back exactly the way they were. She told me to expect to be in 8s and that that would be okay! I have reminded myself of her advice many times over the years and I've shared it with a lot of other women, too.

All of this may sound very personal, but I don't think of it as being that way. I know many of my friends and women I've talked to have struggled with their weight at different times in in their lives. Let me define what I mean by struggle--not feeling like they are the weight they want to be or not feeling good about the weight they are. I think that right now I am wondering if I will ever be okay with my weight. When I lose the 5 lbs., will I look the way I think I'm supposed to? Is that what really matters? Or should it really matter more that I feel fine the way I am right now? Am I making this an idol and giving it too much of my energy?

The other reason I ponder this often is what it means for my daughters and how I am raising them. I don't want them to worry about their weight. I want them to feel good about themselves and take care of themselves--but I don't want them to feel like they have to compare themselves to everyone else or be worried about the number on the scale. And I really want them to enjoy the food that God has given us to eat! Every day Autumn puts on clothes and comes in to me and says "Don't I look beautiful (or pretty or some variation)?" I smile and say, "Yes, you do sweetheart." She says it in such an innocent way, not vain at all. She just wants to be pretty =)

Don't we all? =)

I want to feel good just the way I am and not worry about being as thin as my friends. I want to know in my head and my heart that that's okay. But, most of all, I want God to be glorified in what I think about and what I say to others. I don't want to find myself saying, "I don't like myself the way God made me." because that's a horrible thing to say. God made me the way He wanted to make me and I don't want to be a rude and ungrateful child and tell God I think He made a mistake.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Potty Training

When I step back, it really does seem funny to me that potty training can seem so intimidating! I got so anxious about it with Autumn and I have found myself with the same feelings with Sami. I'm not sure why, but I think I have realized a few things (that I'm sure many others before me have realized) about it =)

In Potty Training, I have to discipline myself to be more aware of my daughter's activities and the time that passes. In potty training, I am requiring my daughter then to discipline herself and train herself to listen to her body. That may require her to wake or to stop doing something she really enjoys doing. I think that's tough for us even as adults! =)

I've stayed home a lot this week and that will probably continue for a while. Sami does not like to use the potty in the store, but I have one in my car. So, when we went to run errands today, that was the one she used! What a blessing! I suppose it is a big praise that 5 days after starting potty training we could go run errands for 2 1/2 hours without an accident =) Thanks, God!

And speaking of disciplining myself, I need to go wake her right now!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Parental Authority

My Bible study that I'm going through right now is the Parent's Handbook to Shepherding a Child's Heart. The chapter I've been reading through is on Parental Authority. It has been challenging to me to realize that in the name of giving my daughters choices so that they can learn to make decisions, I have been giving up my authority and allowing them to be the authorities. Wow! When I shared this with Chris, he quickly identified that the areas where we slide are bedtimes, food, and what they wear. But, I am resolved to be a better parent!

Sami is quite strong willed and Autumn copies her when she realizes what Sami is permitted to do--or, I'll be honest, what she gets away with. This morning I realized that it really is time to start potty training Sami. I don't know why, but I dread potty training. It seems like such a big deal!

This morning, I matter of factly and gently told Sami that she was going to wear panties today and that every time Mommy tells her to go try, she needs to go try. She bucked me a little once in a while, but 8 of 10 times she did it right away when I told her to. And we had no accidents today! She even told me that she needed to go (with the help of Autumn speaking up) while we were driving home.

So, we'll see how tomorrow goes...

I have more thoughts about this chapter, but I think they'll have to wait for another day when I'm more awake!

Saturday, August 9, 2008

through the eyes of children

So, we started reading a new devotional book with our kids. Last week, the boys in the story go to the zoo and one boy says to another, "isn't it funny to think that we came from apes?" Chris substituted monkeys for apes because our girls think they're all the same. Then the other little boy says, "No, we didn't. God made us!"

Well, the morning after we read this story, Autumn breaks out at breakfast with "We came from monkeys!" And I said in just as silly a voice, "No, we didn't. God made us!" The girls burst out laughing. We repeated the same refrain for about 10 minutes back and forth sometimes me saying the first thing and sometimes the second.

It really is absurd the idea that we came from monkeys--but it's even funnier seeing it through the eyes of small children! =) I'm so thankful that God made us!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Exhausted

I'm trying to get my plans in place for the school year and figure out how I'm going to do things. But, it's very ironic, I'm struggling to find time to figure out how I'm going to plan my time!

Basically, my plan is going to be to do all the extras with both girls in the morning (Art, Bible, Music, Science, Health, P.E., Calendar Work) then have some play time and lunch. Then, Sami is going to have some "quiet" time in her room, while I do reading, writing, and math with Autumn. Then, well have time together to play or run errands. Then, bath time and dinner. I think I will be able to work with Eli's nap times to do the homeschooling. I hope so, at least!

I'm a little worried about language arts, but I think because I feel insecure about that subject, I'm blowing it out of proportion. I feel fine about math. I just want to find some time to get my plans on paper for language arts and then I think I'll feel a lot better!

I signed the girls up for soccer for September and October and they are very excited. Then, in the spring, I plan on doing dance with Autumn and a sports mix class in the spring so that they can try several different things. I want to put Sami in a gymnastics class, but they're all pretty far from me and pretty expensive. It's a little discouraging. I think that dilemma will have to wait until next year.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Facebook

So, once I had signed up for Facebook months ago, I didn't do anything with it. Then, the other day, I decided to look at it. I accepted my friends' invitations and started finding lots of old friends--friends I really wanted to know how they were. I'm funny that way, but I feel like once we're friends, we'll always be friends. We may not be as close or talk as often, but I will always care.

It has been a joy to my heart to see the children of my friends and even find one that got married last week! I rejoice with her! Amidst the struggles of raising three little ones and all of the tears that flow each day (they are after all 4,2, and 3 months), it brings a smile to me to think of all the ways God has blessed each one of us!

It's funny, but one memory has shaped much of my adult life. This is a little story...

I love my mom. She talks to everyone. She talks to the people she stands in line next to in the grocery store (I learned that from her.) She talks to people in the Doctor's offices (now I do,too.) And she even talks to people when she has had to sit and wait for the Jury Duty call at court.

Just before I got married, she had one of those days when she had to go in for Jury Duty. She sat and chatted all day with another woman. I guess that some time in the day, the lady asked for my mom's address. She gave it to her, not thinking much of it, I think. The time rolled around for my wedding and my mom brought with her a package, a gift. It was a gift for my husband and I from this woman that my mom met. Inside was a vase. We loved it! It is our favorite vase. It means a lot to me because it reminds me of who my mom is and that chance meetings give us the chance to care about others.

Well, I hear my children not taking a nap, so I need to end this little story, but it is one of my favorite stories about my mom.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Penelope

There's something in me that just loves to watch a wholesome romance. Penelope is one of those. It's a fairy tale of sorts, but I liked it so much better than Enchanted. If you want to watch something fun--just to enjoy it. This is a good pick!

It's quite a contrast to Definitely, Maybe--which I wouldn't recommend to anyone. There's something that seems very wrong when the whole plot of a movie is that a father is telling his daughter (when he's on the brink of a divorce with her mother) that he really loved someone else when he married her mother and then the daughter encourages the dad to go find the other woman. Try to miss and avoid this one!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

A Great Parenting Book!

I love the refreshment that I get when I find the water after going through the desert! Since I had Eli, I have just felt like I'm wandering when I read God's word and haven't felt purposeful. I've also felt overwhelmed in my parenting just trying to do everything I did before, but now with three!

But, a few weeks ago I came across a book and thought about ordering. I wanted to make sure it was in our budget for the month, so I waited another two weeks and then ordered it. It arrived yesterday. It is the Parent's Handbook for the book Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp. It has been such a blessing to me! I'm always skeptical about having to buy a study book to go with a book that I've read, but this one is worth it!

The study guide is really a separate book aimed at looking at what the Bible says about parenting. In the first chapter (I'm not even done yet!) God has impressed 2 things upon my heart.

#1: Proverbs 4:23 "Guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life." It is where EVERYTHING stems from and we have to guard what goes into it and be careful what we read and watch. And we have to guard the hearts of our children as well. And everything we do stems from our hearts--it's that important!

#2: Romans 3:14 "Their mouths were filled with cursing and bitterness." The question in regard to this verse was what leads to sin. Answer: Bitterness and cursing. It was as if a huge light bulb went on! Just a few weeks ago, a dear friend of mine and I were talking about people cussing. We both knew it was wrong and not honoring to God, but outside of "do not take the Lord's name in vain", I couldn't explain why. But, this verse helped me understand! I thought back on the times when I hear people cuss (and when I've uttered words I shouldn't) and their was a seed of bitterness in all of it! That is why cussing is wrong--because it reflects that our hearts are bitter and angry. It reflects that our hearts are not loving and glorifying to the Lord. I am so excited to be able to put into words why something is wrong that I've known for so long is wrong, but just couldn't explain!

If Shepherding A Child's Heart has encouraged you, I'm certain the Parent's Handbook will too!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Exercise

I think the conclusion I'm coming to is that it's easier to exercise every day--and just do it--than to exercise 3 or 4 days a week. Every time I miss a day it's harder to exercise the next day. It's harder to find the time anyways with 3 kids! After I had Autumn, I worked out 2-3 times a day until I lost my pregnancy weight. After Sami, I worked out 1-2 times a day. And this time, I walk in place when I'm standing in line somewhere just to try and get some kind of workout in!

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Fellowship and Yoga

This week in our small group we discussed why it is important to continue going to church because we are free in Christ. We go to church because love God and desire to glorify Him in our lives and praise Him. One of the greatest blessings of fellowship is accountability and the concern we have for one another.

One of my friends emailed me about the Yoga ABC video because she was concerned about Yoga. It was a blessing and a challenge to me and I need to mention it in my blog because I wouldn't want to recommend that video without a caveat. You see, I fast forward through the letters N and O. N is for Namaste and the teacher talks about Namaste and O is for Ohm (the sound of the universe supposedly). But, I've been a little lax lately and haven't always been downstairs to fast forward those two letters. That is remiss on my part and my friend's concern reminds me that if I am going to let them watch the video then I need to make sure that I will be nearby to fast forward those two letters. Thank you dear friend for caring enough to challenge me on it!

Curriculum

This year taught me a lot about homeschooling and me! I'm glad I did PreK at home with Autumn. I thought I would have lots of time to plan and do fun art projects and put together my own curriculum and collate it from several books for one subject. But, it just hasn't turned out that way. I realized quickly that I actually have less time to prep for my lessons at home than I did when I was teaching in the public schools!

So, this year, I am picking a book or curriculum for each subject with Autumn. I do have a few books that I am going to supplement with because I love them so much.
So, here's the books I plan to use:
Reading: Continue with How to Teach your child to read in 100 Easy Lessons. Then, use a book I found called "Teaching Phonics: A Balanced Approach" I may have to purchase something midyear if the second book doesn't work out the way I hope.
Reading Comprehension: 2 Read Alouds Every Day
Easy Reading: It's a book with lesson plans to help children learn how to picture what they're reading in their heads. I found it at a book sale at the library and I'm excited to try it. I'll keep you posted on how it works out!

Math:
Singapore Math: I wanted to use this because it promotes critical thinking about Math, but it is still a book that I can use to go through and this year, it has been aligned with CA state standards for math, which I'm happy about.
Developing Number Concepts by Kathy Richardson, Books 1, 2, and 3
I absolutely love these books! Math has been my favorite subject to teach to older students. In grad school, I didn't understand what children initially need to learn in order to gain a good understanding of mathematics and be successful in applying what they've learned. In Book 1, Kathy Richardson explains the basic concepts that children first need to learn--even in learning how to count! It may sound silly, but it was like the lights went on for me when I read it because I just hadn't understood. It has also helped me be much more patient and observant with her in math. I will probably write another post about these books sometime because I just love them so much.

Health:
Horizons Health for K
I haven't ordered them yet, but will soon. I liked the sample because the workbook is designed for Pre-Readers/Early Readers and so many books (like the Singapore Science ones I bought) are not. So, I'm going to try and use the Horizons Health in the fall and Singapore Science in the spring, hopefully.

Handwriting:
Write from the Start
We'll see. I'm curious if this will work for us or not.

Bible: Next year, I want to save up and purchase the sunday school curriculum from Desiring God ministries (John Piper's church), but for this year, my goal is to teach them several hymns and use other books I have.
Daily we start off with The Bible Illustrated for Little Children by Ella Lindvall. I love it! I would recommend it to anyone homeschooling or not. The pictures are not exciting, but the stories are good and biblical. After each little story, there are three questions and it has really helped Autumn learn how to start answering questions about what she has heard. At the beginning of last year, she couldn't answer any of them and now she answers most of them.
I also have Play 'n Learn Bible Stories and I'm going to get My ABC Bible Verses by Susan Hunt. I also have another book that I've started using called Every Day Adventures by Pat Holt that I found at another book sale. It is a treasure. How often do you find a book with stories about Children and God that has questions at the end of each based on Bloom's Taxonomy? They are good questions and I still treasure it all the more knowing I only paid a dime for it!

Art:
Nursery Art from Singapore
I liked the Sample and I'm excited to use it. I found a set of 6 books at a book sale to supplement the curriculum with more examples that the girls will be able to see.

Spanish: I found a fun book with songs to help the girls learn beginning Spanish words and that's where we're going to start this year for an introduction. They already know one of the songs.

Music: Next year, we're hoping to enroll Autumn in Violin lessons, but we're going to wait until then. At home, I plan on doing a lot of dancing with them and learning a lot of new songs. I've ordered a CD by Cedarmont Kids for Patriotic Songs and next month I'm going to order two more by Cedarmont Kids called Christmas Favorites and Christmas Carols.

I think that is one of the most surprising things to me is to realize how much children are exposed to in school and how many resources I want to have at home so that they don't miss out on learning those things. A good example is the CDs by Cedarmont Kids. I really want the girls to learn and enjoy those songs and it does fall under Social Studies.

Writing: I have a curriculum called Step Up To Writing that I used when I was teaching that works for grades K-8, so I'm going to try and use that this year. I think it will involve some prep for me, so I'm not sure how well it's going to work though. But, I love the curriculum, so I'm going to try!

Critical Thinking:
Mind Benders Warm-Up
High Five Alive by Highlights.
Autumn was given a subscription to High Five Alive by her Grandma and we all really like it.

Social Studies: I have a list of topics that need to be covered and a lot of various books to read with them. I also want to go on field trips with the girls so they can see places that we talk about. There's a wonderful library near us that has a place called "Storyville". It is a miniature town for kids 0-5 (no one over 5 can go in). And it's free! It's really a miniature hands-on children's museum for little kids.

PE: I really want to make sure the girls are active every day. We have two exercise videos for kids that they like to do inside when it's hot. One is a My Gym video featuring MYMO, a monkey, and the other is Yoga Kids ABCs. Both are great! I'm going to sign the girls up for soccer for September/October and then Autumn for dance this year.

It sounds like a lot, but I don't think it will be. I discovered last year that lessons at this age are so much shorter than they are in the later grades. I'm not going to overload Autumn. A lot of the subjects will only be twice a week. Next post, I'll try and type up my schedule plan! I'm going to try and learn to format on this better so it will be easier to read next time =)

Friday, July 18, 2008

Back to School

Well, I realized yesterday it is going to be a lot harder come the end of August to talk to my friends. So, I hope that this will be a way to keep in touch. I am going to try and update it every few days. Please comment and let me know what you think about my ideas or things I share!

At the end of August, I will be starting to homeschool Autumn for Kindergarten and Sami for PreK 3. I am excited but it has begun to dawn on me what a change this is going to mean for me in my life. I am starting to think through what my schedule with be for each day. Autumn will be doing Kindergarten at home and then going to PreK-4 at the program she went to last year. It was a great time for her to be social with other kids and it is affordable. Yay, God! (only $60/yr for 2 times a week!) It is a huge blessing to us. My plan is to do Sami's PreK-3 at home during the time that Autumn is at Preschool.

Eli is doing well, but I think that 3 is much harder than 2! I am trying to figure out how to balance everything. Please pray that God would give me wisdom. The girls have been "misbehaving" more than usual and I have been shocked by some of their behaviors. It is very humbling to see them misbehave and realize that I can't just make things work out the way I want them to. I need to trust their hearts to the Lord and seek His guidance in how to mold their hearts and teach them.

I have chosen most of my curriculum, but I need to order my math and health curriculums next week. I want to write about what I'm planning to do for the year in my next post, but the girls just woke and I need to run.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

waiting...

It's been a long, long time since I've written...four and a half months! So, I guess it's time for a little catch up.

We're doing well! The girls are getting excited for Eli to arrive. My due date is in 19 days. I wish it were tomorrow, though. I had forgotten what this last part is like! So much to do and so awkward doing it!