Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Turning My Brain Off

My brain is a jumble of thoughts and stress right at the moment.  I'm trying to calm down, but I'm not being entirely successful at it.  You see, my mom moved across the country to come live near us a week ago.  This week was filled with the normal homeschooling schedule and activities plus helping my mom get her car (it was shipped), have it inspected and registered, get her driver's license, and switch her Medicare supplement provider.  It was a very busy week.  I saw God's fingerprints all along the way.  My mom had such a great attitude about everything.  She lessened what could have been a lot more stress for me than it was.

From the day she arrived, my husband and I began talking together and with her about where would be the wisest place for her to live.  Within a few days, we realized that we didn't want her to buy a house in our neighborhood because we want to move.  We want to move closer to our church family and be a part of people's lives more regularly.  And so began a decluttering movement in our house amidst all of the things my mom and I needed to tackle.  By Friday, the house was mostly decluttered and our real estate agent came over. She sat down with us and talked through what was ahead for us-as both sellers and buyers.  She was encouraging and hopeful.  She has been in this business over 25 years and that was a blessing to me.

Saturday morning brought a full day of busyness.  Painting our upstairs ceiling and many other projects.  Going to see 4 houses.  Going to a birthday party the girls were invited to.  And more painting the ceiling.

Sunday morning brought an hour of painting the ceiling and then cooking for our friends that were coming over for lunch after church.

Amidst all of this my mom was a big help.  She was always ready to pitch in and was never impatient with me.  She understood what we needed to get done and simply supported us as she could.  On Saturday night, I suggested to my mom and husband that my mom should go stay with my friend so there would be less people in our house as we're trying to sell it  Both said, "No."  Wow.  That wasn't the answer I expected.  I expected my husband to want his privacy and my mom to want a break from our kids.  Nope.  I realized in that moment what an amazing blessing that was!

Monday was filled with more minor repairs and moving furniture around.  By the end of the day, pictures were taken and the house was in order.  Tuesday held other tasks for me like getting preapproved for a new mortgage loan and working on our budget.  And now Wednesday has arrived.

It's raining outside and I'm relieved.  The for sale sign should arrive today.  I've heard both negative and positive comments about the possibility of us selling our house right now.  I'm nervous about purchasing a new house, but excited.  I have to come back to the Word.  

Deuteronomy 31:8
8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Psalm 27

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
   whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
   of whom shall I be afraid?
 2 When the wicked advance against me
   to devour[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
   who will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,
   my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
   even then I will be confident.
 4 One thing I ask from the LORD,
   this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
   all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
   and to seek him in his temple.
5 For in the day of trouble
   he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
   and set me high upon a rock.
6 Then my head will be exalted
   above the enemies who surround me;
   at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
   I will sing and make music to the LORD.
7 Hear my voice when I call, LORD;
   be merciful to me and answer me.
8 My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
   Your face, LORD, I will seek.
9 Do not hide your face from me,
   do not turn your servant away in anger;
   you have been my helper.
   Do not reject me or forsake me,
   God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
   the LORD will receive me.
11 Teach me your way, LORD;
   lead me in a straight path
   because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
   for false witnesses rise up against me,
   spouting malicious accusations.
13 I remain confident of this:
   I will see the goodness of the LORD
   in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the LORD;
   be strong and take heart
   and wait for the LORD.

I have felt nervous over the past few days and almost anxious.  But, Psalm 27:14 reminds me of what I'm supposed to do.  Yesterday morning, I was discouraged.  In the span of 2 hours I heard several negative, worrying things.  As I read Psalm 27 this morning, I realized that our enemies may be our friends.  In this case it is not my friends that are the enemies that would attack me, but the things they say.  Those statements are like arrows.  There was no malicious intent on anyone's part, but our cynicism creeps into our lives and what we say.  It steals our hope.  In this case, it stole one of my friend's hopes.  I have compassion for her, not judgement because the same thing happens to me.  Have I stolen someone's hopes by my statements?  Do I reflect that I am trusting the Lord in what I say?  That's definitely something for me to think about today.

Today I am going to remind myself that God has gone before me and is in control of everything.  I can "wait, be strong and take heart, and wait for the Lord."

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