Have you ever been surprised at what comes out of your mouth? I have. I was today! I grew struggling to know how to get along with people and I still make mistakes. Sometimes I keep talking when people really don't want to. Sometimes I say too much--way too much! And sometimes I pry or seem nosy when I really don't mean to. I'm just curious. And something else that happens to me is that I want to fix things. I love to brainstorm. I don't mean to offer advice. I simply love to talk about things and learn about what others know. But, I get carried away.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm still trying to make up for all those years of not having friends. I did have 15 of them after all. But, whatever the reason, my mouth still runs away with me at times like it did today.
I used to go over and over the things in my head that I wish I had or hadn't said. I don't do that very often anymore. But, a new issue has come up. I have begun to realize that I haven't been as aware of people who don't want to or aren't able to talk with me, whether because it isn't the time or for another reason. I have continued to pursue these conversations with them unwittingly!
I am trying to grow more aware of this, but I realize that it is a double edged sword of sorts. I could begin to question whether many people who I talk to don't want to really talk to me. That's where I am now and it feels a bit unsettling.
But, then things happen like tonight. I went to Men's Wearhouse to pick up a suit. I ended up telling the gal at the counter about Eli's speech and how he had speech therapy for eight months. She wanted to know more because her sister is concerned about her son. I gave her one of my blog cards with my email and told her to email me. I'm going to send her the number for them to contact the county about having him evaluated.
Then, I was in McDonald's and had a discussion with the other couple about what a smell we found at the shop and were so surprised that three managers were standing by while we waited 15 minutes for our drinks. Hmmm... We talked about milkshakes and where to get good ones.
Yes, I talk a lot. I realize this. I hope you chuckled at my stories. That is me. It is the best part of my mom--her ability to talk to anyone anywhere. I love that about her. I've never noticed anyone not want to talk to my mom. Maybe I should watch her to learn more from her. ;)
I want to be more sensitive about what I say and to whom. I am thankful that I have many friends who are very gracious to me about my loquaciousness. I hope that I can learn to be be even more aware of when it is time to talk and when it is not. I'm sure I won't always get it right, but God has given me a deep love for people and I love to hear folks' stories and get to know them. I hope He'll help me grow in how I listen and talk with people.