I love the library because I can check out movies and just watch the endings without feeling guilty about having paid to rent the movie. That was the case for one of the two movies I checked out yesterday. The ending was actually even more painful to watch than I thought it would be. I'm so glad I didn't waste my time watching the rest of the movie.
The second movie was Enough Said starring Julia Louis Dreyfuss and James Gandolfini. After the horrible ending to the first one, I thought I'd skip to near the end on this one. I started at a certain point in the movie when Gandolfini's character says this great line. He asks Dreyfuss' character if she protected their relationship. She said that she hadn't. She replied that she had protected herself.
There are so many crummy movies out there. Lots of story lines about a spouse leaving their other spouse for "the right one". The movies make us sympathize with that other person and that relationship over the marriage because of how they portray it. The fuss over celebrities splitting up is interesting. It's become expected. People's cover last week was of Gwyneth Paltrow's and Chris Martin's split. I know this because I've been in a lot of doctors offices this week and People magazine is everywhere. When I was growing up, People was filled with human interest stories. I liked it. It isn't anymore. Now, there's usually one story that's an encouraging, human interest story. Sometimes I pick it up, though, hoping it will remember that it was the magazine of my teenage years. It never is, though.
I picked up this issue hoping to find an encouraging article and read the editor's letter on the inside of the magazine. It was interesting. It spoke of Paltrow's split and how it's understandable, everyone goes through, and we all hope we'll be married for life, but it usually doesn't end up that way. It made me so sad to read this editorial.
Then, I hear something like the line on Enough Said. I was glad to hear it. How do we protect our relationships? Paltrow is all over the news with the phrase "conscious uncoupling". Hmmm...
Marriage isn't easy. It is the union of two sinners who often don't see eye to eye. So, it gets attacked from the inside. But, it also gets attacked from the outside by all the messages we hear from the media and even at times from friends. The media says there's someone better out there. The media says we should be treated or loved the way we want to be loved.
But, that's not what God says. The dialogue in that scene from Enough Said was wise. Before that line, he asks her why she didn't walk away. Why did she stay in that friendship that ultimately tore apart their relationship? His questions were right on. Dreyfuss' character didn't turn her ears away from what she was hearing.
Do I do that? Do I choose to listen to the right things? Do I turn away from the bad ones? It's good to reflect on, pray about, and make sure that I am making wise choices to continually protect my marriage. I am a very loyal wife. I need to make sure that I continually show this to my husband. I do strive to do this. I've been convicted since the first six months of my marriage thirteen years ago that I needed to not dwell on what I thought I deserved from marriage. I remember the moment, actually. We were driving to Austin, Texas, and I was upset over a fight my husband and I were having. And then, I began to think. I had this thought that this was how it started... thinking I deserved this or that. I understood it was a downward spiral that ultimately could lead to the demise of a marriage because that line of thinking feeds itself. I then became convicted that I need to remember that I didn't get married because of what I thought I'd get out of it. I got married because I loved and continue to love my husband. I was convicted from the beginning that I need to protect my marriage and guard my heart. I am thankful that the Lord gave me these convictions.