love to paint

What is the point of parenting?  What is our goal?  Is it to have well behaved kids?  Is it to have kids we are proud of?  Is it so that we can live through them?  Are they the point?  Are they supposed to be the center of our lives?   Here is what three books on my desk say: Tim Kimmel says in his book Grace-Based Parenting that we are to equip our children well so that they can move into adulthood as vital members of the human race...(he) didn't say "as vital members of the Christian community." We need to have kids that can be sent off to the most hostile universities, toil in the greediest work environments...and...not be the least bit intimidated by their surroundings.  Furthermore, they need to be engaged in the lives of people in their culture, gracefully representing Christ's love inside these desperate surroundings." p. 9 Here's another author's way of putting what the goal of parenting is:  to raise great kids.  A gre...

My husband and I have always loved to read.  So, we looked forward to when our children would start reading.  Our oldest daughter began reading in kindergarten and is now in second grade.  She reads well above her grade level.  Since we homeschool, I have a lot of say in what she reads for school and for pleasure.  I didn't realize quite how much control and say I have until yesterday. We had the chance to spend the day together as a family and late in the afternoon we went to Barnes and Noble.  I love to start conversations with strangers, so I began talking with another mom who was watching her daughter at the Thomas the Tank Engine train table where my son was also playing.  It turns out that she is a 5th grade teacher at a local public elementary school.  She has two daughters, 2 and 10.  Her 10 year old daughter is in a 4th grade gifted and talented class.  So, I began talking to her about what her daughter reads. It turns out tha...

Last night, I began to ponder this review.  What makes this book I'm about to review different?  How can I explain why it's different than others I've reviewed before?  Were the others bad?  No.  Would I change my reviews about them?  Maybe, maybe not.  The more books I read, the more I'm challenged to think about what I read, what I read to my children, and what I let them read.  Over the past two years, I've read and reviewed several devotionals for children.  Among them a few stood out... Big Thoughts for Little Children for the preschool set by Kenneth Taylor.  Simple, sweet illustrations.  Language and ideas very appropriate for the 2-4 year olds. God's Mighty Acts in Salvation and God's Mighty Acts of Creation , both by Starr Meade.  Wonderful devotions for middle schoolers and parents.  I was impressed at how she simplified big theological concepts without watering them down. But, I didn't find any devotiona...

Six years ago, I remember listening to an interview with Kendra Smiley on Focus on the Family.  I was driving towards downtown Augusta, Georgia and was thinking of my friend's teenage son and his strong will.  Little did I know at the time how strong willed my second and third children would be at that time--since they hadn't arrived yet!  I liked what she had to say and tucked what she shared in memory.  What I most remember about the interview was her belief that--every strong willed child is motivated by something, but they will pretend as if they don't care about it.   For several years, I've remembered that she wrote a book titled Aaron's Way , but for some reason I never picked it up.  Recently, I realized that I was at a point of exhaustion with my two strong willed children.  My oldest has been saying to me, "Mommy, I just want to make your life easier."  What a sweetie.  But, what I needed help with she couldn't help me with. ...

I have three children and a dog.  I am certain that 2 of my 3 are strong willed.  I am highly suspicious that our Golden Retriever is as well or at least she has willful tendencies.  I am strong willed and my husband is strong willed, so I am fully aware that my children completely come by this trait, or should I say strength ;) naturally.   Even though I am strong willed, I have been struggling the past few months with my younger two children.  More often than not I have found myself simply saying "No", yelling, and not being an effective parent.  I have been concerned at what I've seen in myself, but felt exhausted.   I'm still tired, but not exhausted and burned out like I was last week.  I feel like God has really helped me reset my thinking about my children and how I see my job as their mom.  Last Thursday, I started reading a book titled The Journey of a Strong Willed Child by Kendra Smiley.  On the first page, I only under...

I began writing another entry when I was struck that what it was really about was wasting time, which made me reflect back on my past few days.   Yesterday, I was sitting with another mom outside my daughter's ballet class talking about homeschooling and commitments.  I have to admit this--at that moment I was having a great day and felt such peace about God helping me learn to cut things out and simplify.  My husband's schedule has been crazy lately and instead of packing it fully like I have in the past, I chose to simplify and make our lives less stressful rather than more. The beginning of her conversation began with her asking me how I seemed so calm and how I was able to juggle 3 young kids.  I told her very humbly that I am in a good place right now.  I was enjoying that moment in my life and the peace that God has given me amidst my husband's busy life.  But, I said that very humbly as I explained to her that just the day before we'd gone on a...

I began writing another entry when I was struck that what it was really about was wasting time.  When we pursue something that is more than we can handle, it is a blessing when God says simply "no".  Sometimes that "no" looks like rejection.  Sometimes it is simply a door that never opens.   Yesterday, I was sitting with another mom outside my daughter's ballet class talking about homeschooling and commitments.  I have to admit this--at that moment I was having a great day and felt such peace about God helping me learn to cut things out and simplify.  My husband's schedule has been crazy lately and instead of packing it fully like I have in the past, I chose to simplify and make our lives less stressful rather than more. The beginning of her conversation began with her asking me how I seemed so calm and how I was able to juggle 3 young kids.  I told her very humbly that I am in a good place right now.  I was enjoying that moment in my life a...

Recently, I realized that I didn't find any devotionals for parents to read with their elementary age children last year that I just loved.  I found two for middle schoolers that I loved and one for preschoolers, but none for the ages of my girls.  I recently picked one up off my shelf that I had bought used several years ago by Kenneth Taylor and was disappointed in the first two entries so I set it down.  I do love his devotional for preschoolers, Big Thoughts for Little People, though.  So, I thought I would begin to look for devotionals to read with my girls as they grow older. I found one. Later this week, I'm going to post a review of God's Names by Sally Michaels.  Ms. Michaels is the director, I believe, of Children Desiring God ministry.  This is the arm of John Piper's ministry for children.  My girls and I have been reading it and I have been surprised and pleased with how much I have enjoyed it. Another is on its way to me that I'll b...

Though I've read a lot of books over the past two years (probably more than I'd read in the previous 10 years), some of my favorites are still the old ones.  One of them came to my mind this morning, and I think I'm going to go read it again.  Here are a few that have really encouraged me... Great Women Authors: Their Lives and Their Literature  by Betty Carlson and Jane Stuart Smith This book is a collection of short biographies of women writers.  This was one of the first books that made me realize how interesting biographies can be.  The chapters are short and easy to read.  The two women who wrote the book are/were residents at l'Abri fellowship.  They are thinkers, but this book isn't intellectual.  I thought it was well written when I read it.  You can see a preview of it on Amazon if you're interested. I have realized over the years that many books sit on my shelf and I never pick them up again.  This is a book that I've actu...

There are some things I know about myself.  One is that I often struggle with self discipline.  There are areas where I am disciplined and there are others where I am not.  I want freedom--or what I think is the freedom to do what I want.  But, often that isn't true freedom. "Man's perennial efforts to take himself in hand, however he attempts it, lead to the greatest bondage in which man misses what he was meant to be.  Man's true freedom does not consist of the unfettered power to direct his life, either in a political or in a Stoic sense.  It lies in life with God, lived as it was originally intended by God for man.  He only gains this as he denies himself.  Paradoxically, the free man does not belong to himself.  He belongs to him who has set him free."  J. Blunck Last year, I read the book Distracted by Maggie Jackson.  I read about her ideas about the damage media is doing to our lives and minds.  Our attention spa...

I posted this on facebook tonight: I think nonverbal rejection is worse than verbal rejection. At least you can say something and explain yourself in response when it's verbal. One of the hardest things for me is to not take things personally.  Rejection hurts me deeply.  With everything there are both strengths and weaknesses.  I have such a desire to connect with people. I will pursue them over and and over.  I know that this is the way that God made me.  I have learned over the years to try and pick up on the cues when someone does not want my friendship.   I feel like I learned how to be a friend as a teenager and even as an adult, rather than when I was a child like most people. I grew up without friends for the most part.  I was blessed to get to know a group of girls Spring Semester of my freshman year in high school.  I became best friends with my friend Kim, who I am still friends with today.  She has taught me so much abo...

When I read the title of this book, The Undistracted Widow , by Carol Cornish, I assumed I thought what it meant and then I spoke with my daughter's piano teacher.   She shared with me a story which gave me more insight.   Her mother had been a widow for many years.   After 15 years, she and her brother spoke to her mother about starting to live again.   When her husband died, her mother stayed focused on the past rather than living in the present.   She was distracted, so to speak.   I wanted to read this book because someone I care about deeply became a widow a few years ago.   I don't always know what to say or do and often I feel as if I don't understand her response to me.   But, I want to love her better.   I hoped that reading this book would give me some insight.   I read through the book and reached one of the final chapters which is written for family and friends of a newly widowed woman or man.   In the chapter is a cha...

My husband loves to listen to Mars Hill Audio.  It is a sociological and cultural journal that focuses on the challenges Christians face in our culture.  A few years ago, there was an episode in which Dick Keyes was interviewed about a book that he wrote titled, Seeing Through Cynicism.  I hadn't realized the deep struggle that I had begun to face because cynicism had entered my mind and heart.  I saw it in others in my life, but not in my own.  As I read the book, I felt convicted about the state of my own heart and began to see what I needed to tackle and how I needed to fight the creeping vine of cynicism. You can hear one of the talks here: http://www.marshillaudio.org/resources/mp3/MHAJ-83-Keyes.mp3 This talk begins talking about how cynicism creeps in through marketing.  Keyes goes on to later address how we should address cynicism. If you're interested in listening to that episode of the journal,  http://www.marshillaudio.org/resources/vo...