Skip to main content

Paint

On Monday, my little one year old spilled over half a gallon of white paint on our carpet downstairs...blue carpet. I scrubbed for 3 hours. It's better, but not perfect. But, I learned something.

My husband and I were both able to handle it better than usual and I didn't feel as if I had to be perfect. For a perfectionist, that's hard.

But, because I didn't feel I had to be perfect, it was easier to accept others and love them as they are too. Not because I ever haven't wanted to accept them the way they are, but in my humanness, I haven't always understood people.

And I can't admit this without exposing my sin, but I suppose that's important. I always thought this was something other people did, but this week, I discovered that I've done it too. I realized that at times when I've felt criticized, I have returned that treatment by being critical of the people who indirectly made me feel that way. It isn't right and I am certain that it has not pleased the Lord.

It is a narrow road--the path that leads to God. I think I've always been taught that you must always be growing in your walk with the Lord that you must be becoming less sinful, in a sense; and that you must be more and more Godly in how you live your life. So, this statement may sound very strange, but I think I need first to learn to accept who I am right now and be okay--to seek a humble heart (but not self loathing), to be thankful that God created me the way I am (but not prideful), and to be content (but not resentful of what my life is not) with my life. And then, I hope I will be able to grow in my walk with the Lord. I suppose, truly, all of those things would be growth, though. But, they aren't what we usually think of as growth. I need to be okay being me, so that I don't feel like I have to be anybody else. I don't have to be an amazing writer, the perfect mom, the perfect housekeeper, always exceptionally fit...I think I just need to be okay. For most of my life, there has been someone comparing me with other people--whether it was another person or me comparing myself to others. But, I need God's help in breaking this cycle and letting these things go.

Then, I will be able to love everyone better. In the NIV Bible, the second greatest commandment is put as "Love your neighbor as yourself." The two are connected, I think. The greatest commandment Jesus gives is to love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your soul, and with all your strength.

Well, these are just a few thoughts. I have to close and hope that what I've written is coherant. My children have decided that today is not a day for naps and so we shall take a little car ride. Please let me know what you think of what I've shared here. I would like to know.

Comments

C said…
...more than coherent. Inspired. Well said. Another reminder of why I love you (I can say that on this blog right? I mean, I am your husband!)
February 27, 2007 at 10:04 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Comparison of Verses

Tonight I was reading the Mom's Bible again (NCV) and compared this verse: NCV Ephesians 5:22-24 22 Wives, yield to your husbands, as you do to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church. And he is the Savior of the body, which is the church. 24 As the church yields to Christ, so you wives should yield to your husbands in everything. NIV Ephesians 5:22-24 22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. The Message 22-24 Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewis...
Post a Comment
Read more

Grieved

Why is it that my generation (I belong to Gen X) and generations after us always seem to think that they know more than the generations that have come before us? Why is there such a lack of respect in our generation for our elders? Why do we think that the liturgy of the church and hymns are irrelevant? It is ironic to me that the emergent movement is saying that the seeker sensitive movement is irrelevant. It seems as if it was only a few years ago when it was the seeker sensitive movement that said to the traditional church that it (the traditional church) was irrelevant. I'm reading a book with all of these big words and I want to be honest--I didn't understand a lot of it. I'm not dumb. I understood most of it, but the author was assuming a lot of background knowledge on the part of the reader. Most of the time I learn deep theological concepts and then I have to store them in my "attic" (as Autumn would say) because there isn't enough room in the ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Missing Pieces

The other day I was discussing a book with my mom and explaining to her my concern about how "blame" is cast upon the child in the story.  My mom commented about how deeply I read and consider what is written. Sometimes I wonder if I go overboard.  Am I questioning too much?  Am I overreacting? Why am I reacting this way? I come back to knowing that God wired me this way.  But, I also reflect on how God has guided my path through the maze of books I've read over the past few years and what I've learned from the books themselves and from reading them.   Recently, I read a book that troubled me.  The book I finished reading was  Guiltless Living  by Ginger Hubbard.  When I began reading it, I found myself puzzled and then disconcerted. And in the end, I cried. But, I cried for a different reason than one might suspect. I'd like to explain. I did not read Ms. Hubbard's previous book “ Don't Make Me Count to Three ”, but I knew from f...
Post a Comment
Read more